Dealing with unrelenting stress during coronavirus

The pandemic has introduced stress into all of our lives, and while we told ourselves “only a few more months until things go back to normal”, it’s important to take stock of how the stress has impacted our lives, and ways that we can healthily cope with some of the extra stress.

The collective grief we feel for so many who have passed away from Covid-19 compounds the reality of the gravity of what we are still facing. Now we are contending with second and third waves, further lockdowns in certain parts of the world, and continued restrictions on travel.

As expats, our reduced access to our home base may add to the stress associated with Covid-19.

Stress is a normal part of daily life. In fact, small amounts of stress may help us to respond in crisis situations or provide motivation for challenging tasks. However, ongoing unrelenting stress takes its toll on the body and the mind. When our brains perceive a stressor, our systems activate to respond to the stressor; this is typically referred to as fight or flight.

While this stress response is designed to keep us alive and safe, it is not helpful when it is switched on for long periods of time. Stress hormones stored in the body can have adverse effects on digestion and reproduction.

Mental health may also be affected as when stress is all-consuming and focusing on other tasks becomes difficult.

Constantly adapting and living in a perpetual state of uncertainty while stressors are constantly thrown our way takes a toll on our resources and ultimately on our ability to cope with daily stress.

There are ways in which we can ensure that we are taking care of ourselves and replenishing our resources as we continue to navigate this uncertain territory.

Biorhythms: Our bodies are essentially clocks that work according to the rhythms of the earth, i.e. the sunrise and sunset. Routine is especially helpful during stressful, uncertain times.

Certain hormones are secreted in the morning, e.g., cortisol, and others are secreted in the evening, like melatonin. We can support these biorhythms by regulating and scheduling sleep and meals. Exercise significantly improves biorhythms if timed correctly, either early in the morning or completed at least three hours before bedtime.

Activate your rest-and-digest response: The rest-and-digest response counters the fight-or-flight response. The fastest way to activate this is through slow, controlled breathing. Other strategies include engaging in rhythmic or repetitive movements like meditating with beads, playing with beads in a rhythmic fashion while doing something else, knitting, kneading dough, sewing, playing with play dough, walking, running, skipping rope, or colouring.

Practicing grounding by walking barefoot on grass or sand while focusing on your breath and the contact with the earth can also be helpful.

Focus on what you can control: Notice your mind drifting towards the myriad of things we cannot control right now and watch how it may get stuck in an overthinking, ruminative cycle. The earlier you catch it, the sooner you can bring yourself back into the present moment and focus on something that is in your circle of control. If there isn’t something tangible that you can do in the present moment about the ruminative cause, then it’s best to refocus on that which you can control right now. Sometimes it will be something as simple as coming back to your breath and just noticing the natural rise and fall of the chest as you inhale and exhale.

Feel and express your feelings: Given the length of this stressor, there will be quite a range of intense emotions coming up. Hold space for your feelings, allow them to surface, sit with them and find healthy ways to express them. The latter could include journaling, talking about it with a safe person or therapist, doing a workout, or having a good cry. Be wary of the “I should be grateful” motto doing the rounds. All emotions are valid; feeling and processing them prevents bigger problems.

Self-compassion: When we experience compassion towards others, we firstly notice their suffering, we feel empathy and a call to action followed by a reflection on how hard some people have it. Now we need to do the same for ourselves. Instead of minimizing and invalidating our experience, we can notice that we are not having a good day, feel empathy for ourselves, ask “What do I need right now?” Take compassionate action and reflect on the universal condition of humanity at this time. The inner critic is not invited to this process. Think of how you would speak to someone you care about and apply this very dialogue to yourself.

Pace yourself: Come up for air, literally and figuratively. Schedule downtime, have some fun and have a laugh. This can be challenging when the mind is consumed with overthinking. Practicing acceptance of uncomfortable emotions while having the willingness to continue with routines, self-care and downtime activities summarizes the art of pacing. We now know that downtime helps with problem-solving and can increase productivity, concentration and memory. It has also been shown to reduce stress. It is therefore essential that our coping toolkit includes scheduled downtime during which self-care, play and rest are prioritized.

Dr Ottilia Brown is a clinical psychologist with The Lighthouse Arabia.